Friday Funny: Hitting the rock bottom of online dating

Oct
2012
12

posted by on Life

4 comments

So online dating usually has it’s ups and downs. There are the guys who just send me “hey how r u?” emails and guys who write novels analyzing every thing in my profile in minute detail. Sometimes I’ll get really funny emails that are well worded but I’m just not attracted to the guy (and am so disappointed because it’s so rare I actually get a good email where I burst out laughing). Sometimes I’ll get an email from a gorgeous guy (at least in pictures) that has so many grammatical and spelling errors I can barely understand it and I’m disappointed because he looks good but if he cannot converse with me in ENGLISH then it’s never going to work. And sometimes everything just fits. And then I go on a few dates and it doesn’t work out. Story of my life.

I have been dating for almost six years. That is a really long time. I’ve accrued quite the collection of dating horror stories (and some really good dating stories, they’re not all bad even if they didn’t work out), including the very first date I went on after my ex of three years and I broke up. That was also my very first online date off of Match.com and I’m amazed I ever met another person off of that site after that date ended.

I have mentioned I’m exhausted from dating. Still rings true but dating has reached a new level of hilarity this week.

I have officially hit rock bottom of the online dating pool. I’ve been off of Match for about four or so years. I have been using one free site off and on for a while that I like but I decided to give a dating site that I’ve only used a couple times another shot. It tends to be sketchy at best but seeing it’s been about a year since I’ve been on it, I thought I’d give it another go. Within two hours of unhiding my profile I was contacted by a homeless person.

A HOMELESS PERSON.

I am not sure if I should laugh or cry but this is definitely a first. How does he even have internet access to make a profile?! And I am the least Boulder-like person out there, WHY ME!? As Mindy said, homeless people need love, too … and shelter. Apparently, you looked like you could offer both!

That email definitely gave me enough reason to get back off of that site.

Oh, online dating. If for nothing else, you provide me with endless blog fodder.

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  • http://twitter.com/KristenCurator Kristen C

    I was so fearful of online dating after my divorce and had some crazy tales too, but I met an amazing guy via OK Cupid and we’ve been together for awhile so it is possible!!

  • http://superduperfantastic.com/ suki

    wow. that could be one potential problem of having free wifi everywhere… Eek.

  • http://www.treavioli.com Treavioli

    LOL You give good home, Ashalah.

    I’m a big fan of OkCupid (owned by match but so much better).

  • http://twitter.com/girlsgotshine Girl’s Got Shine

    A friend sent me this link. Love. It. I am also a veteran of the online dating world – almost 4 years. It’s painful at times, with occasional bursts of entertainment. I’ve never met a homeless person – just guys who live with their parents.