Wanderlust hit me hard the other night. Like, hit me over the head with a brick, knock me to the motherfucking floor hard. It made all my other wanderlusting seem incredibly minimal and non-invasive; like I wanted to travel but…ehhh. I could go either way. Now all of a sudden I. MUST. TRAVEL. RIGHT NOW. Or the world will end in five seconds.
Maybe not that dramatic but I nearly started packing my bags. Instead I slept on it (usually a smart move). The next morning I woke up with that same strong urge to move, to broaden my horizons, to shake things up, do something exciting, HAVE AN ADVENTURE. The same feeling I had two years ago when I quit my job and took off for Europe. I think I left little notes on every form of social media I’m involved in saying how I was longing for adventure (most of which were replied to with a “come to santa barbara!” note from Tabitha and/or her husband ). All day it bubbled away in my cauldron, thoughts rolling over themselves as I thought of places I could go, what I should do. If moving was an option or did I just want long-term travel again.
By the time I got home last night around 9:30 after a busy day of moving furniture around the store and selling as much as I could, my cauldron wasn’t bubbling anymore. I had zeroed in on one location. A location I have no idea how I’m going to save up enough to get to but there it was. And suddenly I felt inspired. I felt passion pouring into my blood stream, that passion that had been missing lately. I felt like I could move mountains and paint paintings and sing songs (even though I know very well I absolutely cannot–I will leave that to Chelsea) and write freaking novels. All because I found a place that I want to go to?
Then it got me thinking. HELLO, Ashley. How come travel can get me so passionate and yet I’m not in the travel industry? I mean, I can talk for hours and hours about my adventures, give tips on travel, I FREAKING LOVE TRAVEL. But would working in the travel industry ruin travel for me? We all saw what has happened to my love of Interior Design. Ok maybe no one but me has seen what has happened there but still. My passion has seriously fizzled in that department. I’m afraid that would just happen to this.
I feel that travel really is my true calling. Just what I would do for a career in travel is uncertain. I’ve felt this for a while but my brain throws things at it like “you went to school for seven and a half fucking YEARS for Interior Design, you need to stick with that.” Then I look at what happens when I set my sights on traveling to a new country, or what happens when I get in a conversation with someone about traveling, and I say, well hey, I know a lot about this stuff and I LOVE IT. But what can I do?
All I know is that I’ve been feeling a little lost lately. A little uninspired. And this is the first time probably this year that I feel energized, like I could take on the world. What my next steps will be, I don’t know. All I know is that I’ve got a destination in mind, I have a goal and somehow, I will figure out all the rest. This is the first step and I can guarantee you all will be hearing a lot more about this. The destination is a secret now but all will be revealed once I solidify things.
Oh, and VEDA starts tomorrow. You know, that month where I vlog every single day? Get excited. Or get scared. Either way it’s going to be a BLAST.