posted by Ashalah on Life

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I must have been on some pretty strong “I’m going to Europe” drugs over the summer to make me think moving in with my parents was going to be a ton of fun. Sure, it’s gotten better. I’m no longer angry and frustrated and since landing a couple freelance gigs plus some design work, they have been off my back about getting a job. We’re getting along pretty well, surprisingly.

But (and there’s always a but) I’m living with my PARENTS. While trying to have a social life and date. Explaining why you live with your parents to a guy you could potentially date is always fun and I’m sure is very limiting. I certainly wouldn’t date a guy who still lived with his parents.

Nevertheless, I’m giving it my best, even though it isn’t the best situation. So far I’ve learned a lot about my family. Like….

• My parents bought an intercom system and gave me one half of it so that they can call me without straining their vocal chords for dinner.. So far it has been used by my mom to check if its working properly  (can you hear me now?) and by my dad to tell me the dog barked when he sneezed. When dinner was ready? They screamed up the stairs. Oh, parents.
• I definitely inherited my father’s ability to start a project (or ten) and not finish them before starting new ones. My father has, count it, THREE bathrooms that are in various stages of unfinished. My mom’s bathtub is still untiled, my bathroom is in the stages of getting fixed but my shower has taken 2 weeks to tile and I don’t think its going to be and somewhere in Ann Arbor is a bathroom he’s fixing for free that still isn’t done. Bravo, Dad.
• My mom has been hounding me for a week to do laundry. She doesn’t understand how I possibly have anymore underwear left or clothes at all. She must not have gotten the memo about how I constantly would go buy Victoria Secret’s 5 for $25 when I ran out of clean underwear and didn’t want to go to the laundromat. I got skills on making my clothes last.
• My mother only comes up to the third floor if she hasn’t met her daily quota of yelling. My brother and I live up here and my dad is sometimes working on the bathroom. Usually if my dad is downstairs she’ll get her yelling out of her system. But if my brother’s been at work, I’ve been hiding upstairs and my dad’s been up here working, she’ll come upstairs just so she can yell at someone. I think she got the intercom just so she doesn’t have to climb all those stairs just to yell.
• I have gotten extremely lazy and rarely get out of my pajamas until past noon (today is no exception!). Sometimes its three or four o’clock by the time I get jeans and an actual sweater on (just so when I reappear downstairs for food, I don’t get yelled at.). Luckily, I’m not alone. Its also rare my mother gets out of her robe before noon so at least we keep each other company.
• My parents have date nights on Friday nights which is really cute. Except they both forget and when it comes time for dinner my mother will then remember and yell at my dad for forgetting he was supposed to take her out for a date. My mom needs to take the yelling down a notch. Or twenty.
• The Christmas Tree is like the elephant in the room. It has sat there undecorated and ignored for a week and a half. We all ignore it, hoping someone else will decorate it and put presents underneath it. Christmas spirit is severely missing in this household.
• I have forgotten how hard it is to eat while my brother is around. It’s like the Amazing Race: Ashley’s Kitchen around here, with each family member trying to get at the food before the giant does and eats it all. I lose. OFTEN.
• My parents will ask me for help on their computer. A couple months later, when something goes wrong with the computer, they’ll point out the time I helped them then blame me for breaking it. Umm. Yeah cause THAT makes sense.

It’s only a couple more days til Christmas and while I’m feeling more festive, I still haven’t finished my Christmas shopping. And I still haven’t written out christmas cards, much less sent any. This holiday has been one big EPIC FAIL.

The New Year better bring back my motivation, a steady job and my own place.

Tags: Ma Familia, Nothing At All, Oh Look a Funny!, Why you should never live at home